Ramen and char-siu nirvana (Minca Ramen)

While the ramen fad peaked in 2011 (or was it 2010?) and the world has moved onto things like cronuts, I haven't moved on yet. I don't like change. I like constancy. Or maybe I share some similarities to the Pokemon Slowpoke. Today, in the middle of this assclown ridiculously hot and humid summer, I'm going to tell you a secret that's utterly useless to you now. A secret I held near and dear to my heart for years out of fear that tourists and douches would ruin it if it got legitimately popular - stares in the general direction of Prosperity Dumpling. Today, I shall reveal to you my favorite Japanese noodle place in the entire world. Including Japan. Although I've never eaten ramen there (except in the airport), so that's somewhat of a bullshit claim. Whatever, I feel like I eat enough of a variety of noodles where I can claim some sort of demented expert status in this kind of thing. Anyway, while almost every blogger in NYC will prematurely ejactulate over Ippudo or touch themselves at the mere thought of Totto Ramen - I can't get behind that crap. I'm not prepared to wait 30 minutes for a bowl of noodles (up to an hour if you're unfortunate). Frankly, I don't care for the atmosphere either. I just want to shove my face full of fatty-ass pork, slurp up some noodles, and drown in a thick creamy broth. That's where Minca comes in.



There's a saying in software development that was made popular around the time Facebook started blowing up... "move fast and break things." Well Minca's ramen is delivered way fast, and wreaks havoc on my digestive system. So there's that. One of the huge draws is the fact that I literally don't have to wait for shit. I've never had to wait for a table (grabbing a seat at the bar is almost always an option), and within 5 minutes of ordering, there's usually a bowl of sensual flavors sitting in my face. Look at that photo, that guy is literally servicing 6 customers at once. No inefficiencies in this place.



Damn, their gyoza sure are pretty. To be honest, I feel bad paying for gyoza. Yes, they're innately different from the 5 for $1 dumplings in Chinatown - they're more delicate, less doughy, and comprise of more meat, but they're still a horrible value for what you're paying. That said, Minca's are pretty tight. They have a certain fragrance of pork that's just a cut above what you normally get with cheapo dumps. The skins are insanely thin, yet eerily resilient. They're like that kid in highschool that got picked on all the time and you thought would just fucking lose it, but doesn't. That kind of resilience.



But you're not there for the gyoza. You're there for this shit. There are few things that bring me more joy than Lord of the Rings lego sets, and their Minca Sio ramen is one of them. You like fine-ass noodles with snap and elasticity? Hell yeah they got that shit locked down. You like rich creamy pork broth heavy on the garlic and sesame oil? They got those too. You looking for tight as fuck roast pork that they freaking flame torch on the spot? They've got that in spades (and are probably one of the only ramen places in NYC that does it). The components all sound wonderful, but the amalgam of bits results in a bowl of soul soothingly smooth noodles that has character from start to finish. The first bites are almost overwhelming, but as you take bite after bite, the flavors mellow, the tastes meld, and the experience is indescribable. Each mouthful of noodles gets intercepted by bites of crispy pork, rendered fat, and crunchy seaweed. It's honestly a whirlwind of textures layered on top of in your face flavor.

I'm not terribly good with words, but this is one of those places I go to even during the summer. Even when I'm sweating up a tropical storm of perspiration, I have urges. Just like sometimes you gotta rub one out, sometimes I gotta get my ramen on. Minca is probably the only place that can settle my 'congeez,' as my Nigerian friend would say.

tl;dr - in an effort to keep assclowns from ruining my favorite ramen place, I've waited three years to reveal my go to joint. If Minca were a significant other, it would be sexual in all the right ways, and dependable in all those other boring ways. Their ramen is just short of god-like. Ippudo can suck it.

Minca Ramen
536 E 5th St, New York, NY 10009
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Best things I've had in my mouth (2012 edition)

This photo is unrelated to anything. I wish there really were a giant sized ice cream sandwich though...

Since I took ass-clown forever to write this post, I'm about two weeks too late to jump on the 'Best of' hash tag bandwagon. So just consider this a preview of posts yet to come... since I'm as backed up on posts as a geriatric who's lost their Metamucil. Anyway, as most of you are probably aware of, I did a pretty shit-tastic job of blogging this year. I'll admit it... my blog was about as successful as Betty White is sexy i.e. occasionally, but totally by accident. I posted maybe once a month and I have a backlog of unedited photos longer than one of Conan the Barbarian's legendary ass-hairs. That's not to say I didn't eat a metric ass-load of food (that's a real measurement), and that's not to say I didn't have my share of "oh wow, this needs to be made known bites." I was just lazy. Sorry. Without further ado... here's a list of five things that I consumed in 2012 that either 1. made me "turn my tighty-whities into frownie brownies" or 2. made me smile from ear to ear.

For the record, these aren't in any sort of order. I just randomly think of these things when I'm on the toilet. Actually, I guess you could say they're in the order I thought about memorable meals while on the toilet. I don't think anyone wants to think of it that way though.



1. Soup Dumplings at Nan Xiang (南翔小籠包) - Shit son. I like pork buns and I cannot lie. You other brothas can't deny. When a bun comes in with pork broth taste and a thin skin in my face I get sprung. Maybe not everyone's not like me. Maybe pork meatballs surrounded by a soup-laden bubble of carbohydrates isn't your thing. I say this with all due respect, but go eat a bundle of dicks. That should be everyone's thing. There are few things more glorious than the engineering marvels that are soup dumplings - from the dangerously delicate wrapper to the extremely volatile soup and meat suspension - these things defy logic. They are impossible structures of culinary masterpiece as well as literal flavor bomb. Nowhere in NYC will you find a better version than the one at Nan Xiang. Just be thankful that almost every asshat you come across will tell you that Joe's Shanghai is the place to go... it ensures the wait time here is shorter. Also get the deep fried beef scallion pancakes. Ermahgerd worthy.



2. Chahan at Naruto Ramen - As an Asian person, it's not often that I'm excited by something as plain as fried rice. I feel like I'm probably setting back stereotypes decades by saying this, but fried rice is part of my culture, I feel like I understand its most intimate desires, how it wants to taste, how it wants to clog my arteries with every grain of oil coated rice, how it should... be. As something of a fried rice connoisseur (note: holy shit, I surprised myself by spelling that correctly on first go...) Naruto Ramen does some next level shit when they decided to add 'chahan' to their menu. There's nothing complex about what goes into that pile of glorious starch and oil, it's a simple fried rice with roast pork, narutomaki, and scallions and eggs to finish. What I couldn't have expected was the depth of flavor such a simple mix would have over high heat. Fried rice is hard to fuck up for sure, but it's also damn hard to get this good. I feel like a dumbass for writing about fried rice, but this is some seriously dangerous shiz. Worth the trip up to the UES alone, and worth eating on its own as a standalone meal. Their ramen is good, but there's simply no point. It's a waste of carbs.



3. Fried potstickers at Tasty Dumpling - Woops. I fucked up. I admit it. Last year I might've told you that Prosperity Dumpling was the undisputed king of the dollar dumpling stores in Chinatown. I stand by the statement that at five for $1, that deal is something spectacular, but something happened this year. Something changed about them. For the first time in my life, I will go against the prudent economic choice and tell you that the best dumplings (according to this idiot at least) are five for $1.25. Yes. Even at a 25% premium on price, I'm telling you that Tasty Dumpling's dumplings are indeed the tits when it comes to pockets of meat. I'll eventually explain the full logic behind this statement in a post down the road, but for now - I feel like the fact that I'm willing to pay that much more per dumpling should be proof enough of Tasty's quality.



4. Sio Ramen from Minca - If you ask most people where the best Ramen in NYC is, you'll get a smattering of answers. Surely you'll hear Ippudo come up again and again, but honestly... waiting an hour plus for a bowl of noodles is pretty ridiculous in my opinion. Some will undoubtedly say Totto, Terakawa, or maybe Setagaya. I've been to all of them and as far as I'm concerned... none of their offerings can hold a candle to the sio ramen at Minca. Rich garlicy broth is mixed with springy noodles that stretch longer than a broken Stretch Armstrong doll. The crowning piece to this Pandora's box of flavor is the fact that they flame torch your bowl at the very end, bringing a slight and gentle charring to the char siu they lay delicately on top. The layer of rendered pork fat on top glistens in the soup acting as a mirror so you can see your own 'O-face' when you've taken your first bite.



5. (RIP) Cake cuts at Hong Cafe - Yeah, I'm cheating here. This shit doesn't exist anymore, but that doesn't diminish how wonderful it once was (during 2012). What was once the glorious Hon Cafe - not just a restaurant, but an institution of brilliance and efficiency and the best source of cake cuts in the city - is now a lame-ass over-priced joint called Mottzar Kitchen. What the fuck is a 'Mottzar' anyway? Once upon a time, Hon Cafe used to take its cosmetically challenged cake nubbins and would bag them up in an orphanage of sorts. They'd slap a $2 price tag on each bag, each special... full of unique defects, and sell them in the front window. Most people walked by, disgusted by the non-homogeneity of these bags of freak cakes. Not I. I saw their inner beauty. I knew that those non-symmetric rings of cream, sugar, and flour were just as good as their supermodel cousins, but at a fraction of the cost. I would make it a point to save these 'B+' cakes, discarded in a harsh Asian 'tiger-mom' world and save them - eating an entire bag with each sitting. Alas, they are no more. If someone has any leads on cake cuts... I will pay you a king's ransom for that knowledge.

So what's going to happen in 2013? I'll start blogging again. As much as I hate to admit it, I like to write, and I like getting in random internet arguments with strangers. Yes, to some degree I'm an attention whore. Aside from that? Maybe I'll use my recently discovered non-allergy to seafood and take it for a test drive. Maybe 2013 is the year of shrimp. Lots of shrimp. Less pork. Ha, unlikely. Realistically this year will be more of the same. More artery clogging, more catching up on posts, not enough money.

tl;dr - here's a bunch of things that I was uncomfortably excited to have in my mouth in 2012. Number 5 makes me sad. If someone can help me find cake cuts in Chinatown, you will be my new best friend. Or if you don't want to be my best friend... go eat a dick. Seriously though, tell me.
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Grand slam curry (Go! Go! Curry!)

From the same country that brought you Godzilla (cool), tentacle porn (disturbing), and girl groups with 48 members (erotic?), Japan has also given us Go! Go! Curry! - which is awesome. Now, I don't think it's any secret that Go! Go! Curry! is pretty dope when it comes to curry in NYC. Not that it's really all that hard to impress me when you start breading and frying shit, but I do consider myself something of a katsu-connoisseur, and theirs are pretty much the bee's knees, even when compared to the ones I've had in Asia. While their regular katsu curry dishes are already pretty reasonably priced for the wallet/butthole-violating area that is midtown - and that's not even counting the the fact that if you go on any day after Matsui hits a homerun (not that often), or any day that ends in a '5' a.k.a. 'Go!' days, you receive a free topping coupon - there's something else on their menu that exceeds all expectations when it comes to value + my dreams of things that are fried. Sure you could spend $7 to $10 on a regular one topping curry, but why the fuck would you... when you can get the 'number one champion best deal curry' - as I was told by the guy at the counter - the Grand Slam Curry?



The kind folks at Go! Go! decided to go fucking apeshit with the Grand Slam Curry. Instead of just having a single pork/chicken cutlet... you get both. Also some sausage links... and some fried tempura shrimp... and also some shredded lettuce and a split boiled egg - most likely only there so you don't feel like a fat piece of shit for piling down what basically amounts to three fried pieces of meat, glorious brown sauce, and a double serving of rice. Whatever, even shitty lettuce tastes pretty good when paired with Japanese curry sauce.



I'm not going to harp on the the fact that their chicken/pork cutlets are juicy as hell, or that their breading is fucking golden, brown, and most certainly delicious (although both are very true statements). What I wanted to make clear with this post is the fact that this is a ridiculously dope value play when it comes to food. Think about it this way: a single XL curry with a katsu on top will be $8.50 minimum. I suppose you could add another thingy of meat to that platter for $2, but then you're up to $10.50. Now throw in the egg (which in actuality I couldn't give two shits about), the fried shrimp (which I'm allergic to), and the pork sausage thingers - and you're up another $5.50. Even if you're just counting stuff I like eating, I'd be paying the same amount. I'm pretty sure the Grand Slam Curry gets more rice/sauce though. As a very frugal Asian person, I'm not about to turn down free stuff... regardless of if I want it/it will kill me. It's simple math + genetics. For less than a 50% increase in cost, I can get twice as much food, and also a very thrilling allergic reaction-type experience. It's like dinner and a show!

tl;dr - Go! Go! Curry is pretty good at making curry and frying things. If you go, you absolutely should man up and order the Grand Slam Curry (and finish it yourself). It is the pinnacle of price performance on their menu. You're welcome.

GO!GO!CURRY! New York‎
273 W 38th St, New York, 10018
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Pork katsu don (Ajia Japanese)

Things that are delicious to me... pork and things that are fried. Combine the two and you have an instant recipe for success, a formula for food that's pretty much impossible to fuck up. That food is pork katsu. When you add -don to that and put it over a giant bowl of soy sauce + sugar rice... well then you pretty much just made me the happiest Asian boy this side of the Pacific. Since my regular diet consists of basically ice cream, cheesesteaks, burgers, and Chinese food, I was pretty excited to grab some fat-laden fried pork at a local Japanese joint called 'Ajia.'

Little did I know that it was actually possible to screw up frying a piece of pork. First off, the lunch special is like $8. Now I realize to most people that's not exactly putting a hurt on the wallet, but I'm working the poor graduate student angle here (so visit, and make others visit, often!)... that's like 4 tacos from Don Memo. Know something? Their katsu don isn't 4 tacos good. In fact, it's not good at all. The cutlet comes out dripping in oil (in a bad way), the panko breadcrumbs are less than crunchy, and the pork is uninspiring and dry... despite an oil spill that could put BP to shame. How the hell do you screw up something SO EASY?

When you consider the issue of portion sizing (let's say they believe strongly in portion control), and the fact that they basically give you a bowl half-filled with onions... you end up with a giant (by which I mean medium sized) bowl of fail. Have I mentioned it was doused in oil? Because it was doused in oil.



California rolls as appetizers! I'm not really sure what to say about these aside from the fact that I probably shouldn't have eaten them (BUT THEY WERE FREE). With my slight seafood allergy in tow, I stupidly ate several pieces, not even for the sake of blogging... but for the sake of being a cheap Asian. Uh, these were pretty much wasted calories. I went home and scratched like an idiot, but with zero satisfaction. Usually when I go to dim sum and eat tons of seafood, I go home itchy as hell, but I'm usually okay with it because the food was fucking incredible. Not this time. I mean, they taste fine and all, but... let's just say... I am disappoint.

Japanese food has never made me so sad before.
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More dishes from KOJA

I've written about KOJA before (see here, and here), but that doesn't expand on the full awesomeness of their little truck operation. On Friday's I don't really have a set schedule since I don't have class and have zero incentive to wake up to do anything, but you can say with 100% certainty, that sometime after 3 pm... I will be at the KOJA truck getting dinner. Not any other day of the week, just Friday. While this probably makes me sound neurotic and like some sort of idiot, there's a good reason. Sort of. On Fridays after 3 pm, something magical happens... like when the clock strikes midnight and Cinderella turns back into the bumpkin that she is, but in reverse... everything on their menu becomes $4.50, which is all sorts of awesome.

Normally everything on their menu is around $5.50... which, now that I think about it, actually isn't all that expensive, but... I'll take those savings any day!



The jap chae here is pretty good. It's not Koreana good, but it's pretty decent. Plus when it's $4.50, you really have very little to complain about. There's nothing out of the ordinary, it's just a really massive portion of glass noodles cooked with vegetables, served over rice, and with 2 fried dumplings. The dumplings kind of suck (never get them as an appetizer... ever), but when you give me carbs on top of more carbs for next to nothing... then we straight yo.



The pork bulgogi is actually one of my favorite dishes at the cart. I know bulgogi should technically be beef, but whatever... sweet beef is just too mild for me. I go spicy pork, because that's the manliest thing possible... or something along those lines. The pork isn't the tenderest cut, and the sauce could use some tweaking, but the main flavor profile is present. By which I mean spicy. If you ask them to cook it mild, it will actually be spicy. If you ask them to make it extra spicy, you will most likely be on the toilet and in pain. You have been forewarned.



More noodles! I was once told that I should get the noodle dishes here, since they'll pile them across all portions of the box without wasting any precious real estate for rice. True story. The beef sukiyaki yakisoba was decently good. The noodles were springy, the sauce was savory, with a subtle hint of sweetness, and the beef was appropriately tender, but the main point here is that there's a buttload of food for not that much money.

Basically, their food is alright at regular prices. Not something I'd go to as a default. On Fridays though... shit's on, and I'm always down for Korean-Japanese food (if it's after 3 pm).
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Chicken wings from Tebaya

When I found out that I had to go back to NYC for a weekend, I thought long and hard about what I wanted to do... I mean eat. There's a lot of things that I never had the chance to try, a lot of restaurants that I miss immensely, and a lot of places that just opened up that I've never even seen before. Too much food, not enough stomachs... a dilemma I seem to come across pretty frequently in life. I was craving Korean fried chicken, so I considered going to Kyochon or Bonchon, but what's the fun in that? I've been to both numerous times already. I really wanted to try something new, which is when I remembered a place that I'd heard about years ago, but never got to visit... Tebaya.

I had first heard about Tebaya way back when, even before I lived in NYC. I saw a profile done on them by some Japanese food show where they introduced their specialty, lightly fried chicken wings coated in a sweet and savory teriyaki sauce. It sounded like the winning idea ever, and the photos made it look even better, but for some reason or another, I never made it a point to try it. Then, a few months ago, I read about it again on Danny's blog, and I knew that this shit was real legit. I knew I had to have it.



Their chicken wing lunch special will run you $6.95. It's basically 8 of their wings served over plain white rice, with some bootleg salad served on the side (it's just plain lettuce, slivered carrots, and a small cup of vinegar dressing on the side). A bit annoying is the fact that they no longer give you a drink as part of the meal, but whatever, minor gripe. Shit son... no one's going here for their drinks, it's all about the chicken! Anyway, not gonna mince words here, the wings are fantabulous... that's right, so good I had to make up a word to describe them. Fried skin on, they're superbly light and crisp, without a semblance of burning. The inner meat is juicy and perfectly tender. Even if they were just served straight up plain, I'm pretty sure I'd still be able to down them without complaint, but what elevates it to a whole 'nother level is for sure the sauce. Seeming to defy science, the sauce is viscous enough to stick to the crispy skin, but not your fingers. The flavor profile is a sweet teriyaki blend, with a subtle vinegar-like kick. I know people tell me not to say this, but these wings are sensual. That's the only way I can think of to describe them. I'll leave it at that.
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Bulgogi pork cheesesteak (Koja)

Have you ever found yourself torn between choosing spicy Korean pork and cheesesteak? One is a well groomed package of oily convenience, while the other is a deliciously spicy mess of a meal with limited mobility. How can you possibly decide!? Good news... you don't have to. In somewhat of a conflict of interest, I didn't write about Koja (the hybrid Korean-Japanese truck that lives on 38th street) here, but this... I couldn't bring myself to write for another site. It's like I'm cheating on myself or something. Anyway, I present to you... the bulgogi pork cheesesteak.

I don't think I need to really explain this one. You take a regular hoagie roll, layer some cheese inside (I'm guessing provolone?), and layer on spicy bulgogi (or however you want to spell it) pork w/peppers and onions. A stroke of pure genius. Nothing could make this sandwich any better.



Oh wait. Yes there is. It is $3. For just $3, you get a 10" sandwich stuffed with an entire serving of spicy pork with gochujang. If I could somehow quantify taste and value per dollar, this shit would be off the charts. Just consider the fact that you can have 30" of spicy pork cheesesteak for less than a single Hamilton. Fuck, I bet even Kim Jong Il would be down with that. Insane.



But the thing is, even if it were twice the price, I'd still absolutely love it. That's how good it is in actuality. The bread is a plain hoagie roll that gets toasted, but the part that makes it special is the fact that it somehow gets covered in a thin coating of sweet chili oil. Spectacularly flavorful and soft, it's the kind of combination I wish all my sandwich breads used. Inside, the pork is no slouch either. Cooked fresh with a heaping handful of onions and a mix of red and green peppers, the pork is just spicy enough to numb the tongue without going overboard. Adequately tender, the cheapish meat, high in fat content, truly glistens in bright red glory. It's no shabbier than their standard bulgogi, which on its own is pretty good.

I'll put it this way (at the risk of being crucified by traditionalists)... I love my cheesesteaks the original way just fine. Put some peppers, onions, cheese and plain steak on a roll and I'd consider it a fine meal. If you give me the option of having a jazzed up Korean version of cheesesteak? I'll take that 9 times out of 10. Especially at this price. Way to go Koja.
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Japanese BBQ (我!就厲害... 烤肉)

Japanese (erm... Korean) barbecue is fun for everyone... aside from vegetarians I guess. You get to grill the meat yourself and come out smelling like smoked meat, it's win win! The one thing I could never stomach in NYC though, was the price. Yes indeed, it's more whining from the person who wasted a quarter mil on tuition... ha. I never understood how a plate of thinly sliced pork belly could even come remotely close to costing $20+. Theoretically, I could go to any Asian supermarket and buy damn near 10 pounds for the cost. For that reason, it was something I rarely indulged in. Taiwan fixes all this. Like pretty much everything food related, Japanese barbecue is super cheap. Like 399 NT ($13) for all you can eat cheap. In this post... we explore how I stuff my face with pork and beef!



I actually don't think this place is all that special in the grand scheme of things. There's a lot of these places similar to this, and they're probably more or less the same. Fundamental differences... some places have all you can drink beer, some places have more flavors of ice cream, and some places use gas ranges instead of stone pots. Whatever... 大同小異吧. Why'd I pick this place out of the blue? The name is straight awesome. Named 我!就厲害, it loosely translates to 'I'm the best.' With that kind of self-proclamation, how could I not eat here? Bonus points for using an old fashioned stone pot...



PORK! Since it was all you can eat, it seemed like a more prudent decision to get a mixed platter of meat. Instead of... you know, like 10 plates of pork belly and only pork belly. They brought this out. If you expect me to remember everything on that plate, well, sorry... I promise you I enjoyed it very much though. The cuts were decent (and supposedly 'black' pork). No complaints.



And the same thing with beef. It's just a mixed plate of random cuts of beef. There was actually another tray with more beef, but I came to the realization that everything looks relatively similar when it comes to meat. If it's not red, it's white. Mmm, these were good too. It's pretty hard to screw up barbecue methinks. Unless you forget something and it catches on fire. That didn't happen to me at all multiple times that day. Nope, not once.



Cooked meat! I'm pretty sure the only things on the grill in that picture are pork belly and beef short ribs. When the fat from the meats melted onto the hot coals... damn, that smell is something you just can't describe or replicate outside of a barbecue house. It's a culinary wonder to say the least. The smell alone is enough to drive me insane. The meat most certainly didn't disappoint either. Fatty enough for the meat flavor to linger in your mouth, but not so much that it's overwhelming or disgusting to chew through. Like I said, with good cuts of pork or beef, it's hard to screw up something as simple as putting meat to heat. Okay, maybe I have one complaint. They wouldn't serve me cow tongue because it wasn't dinner time. What kind of nonsense is that? Hrmph.



They also gave us chocolate marshmallows and pieces of sliced mochi. I had this great plan of making mochi smores with the marshmallows, but alas... I am an idiot, and this plan definitely did not work out as I imagined. Basically, I burned my fingers in liquid marshmallow and tried to salvage the situation by shoving mochi in my mouth and licking my fingers. I probably looked like I was an 8 year old with fine motor skill problems. Sigh.



The mochi by itself was pretty good. Nothing spectacular, but if you grilled them until they just began to show grill marks, then dipped them in the peanut flour provided, they tasted just like the traditional stuff. Except... hot? Yeah, that's pretty much all there is to that. Anyway, it was a fun meal, and amazingly, the cost was less than that of a single tray of pork belly in Manhattan. The conversion factor still amazes me when I truly sit down and think about it.

PS - they have apple milk tea here... and strawberry milk tea. Do you have any clue how fat I'd still be if I grew up drinking apple milk tea instead of Yoohoo? Ho-ly crap.
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Katsu curry (咖哩屋)

Price shouldn't be indicative of quality... but for some reason, plenty of people associate the cost of a dish with its quality. That's correlation, not causation! I understand that higher costs are, in many cases, driven by the difficulty of preparation, or the cost of ingredients, but in the case of something as simple as fried pork, curry sauce, and rice, where neither preparation, nor ingredients can be considered extravagant... I think what I said is pretty reasonable. Case in point, the katsu curry at 咖哩屋 (Curry House).

Finding a katsu curry in Taiwan is damn easy. Every better or worse, every Japanese restaurant has it on their menu. Finding a good katsu curry in Taiwan... is not as easy (although not impossible). When I happened upon 咖哩屋, located next to an 'adult entertainment' shop of all places, I don't think I was expecting anything great. I just wanted something super cheap and filling. When I saw katsu curry on their menu for 70 NT (a smidgen over $2), I was prepared for mediocrity. It seemed impossible that the cost of their katsu bowl was less than an individual piece of katsu pork in NYC. When I tried it though, the flavor was surprisingly full. With a curry that's both subtle in sweet and spiciness, their sauce is basically liquid crack. Easily worth its own weight in gold. The katsu is pre-fried, but with a quick second frying, comes out crispier than ever, preserving a vast majority of the succulent pork juice. In summary? Nice crispy cutlet and a sauce to die for... for $2. How sick is that?

Is it the best I've ever had? Probably not... but because it's $2, and isn't that far off from the places that charge 300+ NT, it's a place to I've been to time and time again.
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Katsu at 杏子 (Anzu)

In an unexpected alley near the 和平捷運站 (He Ping MRT), there exists a quaint little Japanese restaurant that has a store front that garners little attention to onlookers (see above), but houses one of the more famous pork Katsu dishes in Taipei... 杏子 which apparently is 'Anzu' in Japanese. Well aware that I am a grade-A fatass, one of my aunts decided it would be a good idea if I experienced what she called the 'best pork cutlet in Asia.' Coming from a woman who could possibly out eat me, I respect her opinion greatly. Despite that, I was still a bit skeptical of that claim, considering we weren't in Japan. Anyway, I'm not one to turn down a free meal, so I went in with low expectations...



Before I could make it into the front door, I was greeted by a little sign with the daily special, which was a cheese filled pork katsu. This isn't tremendously unique in Taiwan, but it also isn't something that every shop has, so that was a pleasant surprise. Let's be honest, I like cheese a lot, I like pork a lot too, and I most certainly like when people fry stuff. At the very least, I would be snacking on something that combines 3 of my favorite elements of cuisine.



I made someone else order the scallions and garlic katsu (290 NT or ~$9) for comparisons sake. I actually didn't get to eat too much of this (okay, so maybe I stole a few pieces from the other plate), but my overall impression was... despite an excellent crust, the toppings of scallion and garlic paste was overwhelming when compared to the delicate taste of the pork. In the end, you just end up with a mouth smelling like garlic, with no positive memories of the dish. Skip this unless your taste buds are entirely dead.



I ordered the special as advertised. For the same 290 NT, a pork katsu sandwiching a thick filling of cheese. Mmmm, golden fried pork with creamy dairy filling. What hidden treasures lay inside?



THIS! So let me explain this dish. You might think you've experienced katsu, but you haven't experienced it. The shop selects a supremely fatty cut of pork cutlet (not disgustingly oily, just enough to render the meat stupid tender), beats the crap out of it, slices it along the bias, stuffs in a large slab of mozzarella, then covers the creation in panko breadcrumbs, then fries to a perfect tint of goldenrod. The end result is a crust that presents an initial crunch reminiscent of a potato chip, yields to a layer of meat tender enough to pull apart with chopsticks, and a center layer of melted cheese just barely viscous enough to remain within the sliced cutlet. Yes, it's that good. I'm no authority on pork katsu (or any other food for that matter), but I have eaten enough of them to recognize the superiority of this one. Maybe it's not the greatest cutlet on the Pacific rim, but let's be honest... for under $10, I'd be a mega idiot if I said it wasn't incredible.
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Imagawayaki time! (光華紅豆餅)

Hello hovering golden puck of joy (let us pretend my fat hand is not present in the picture)! That floating disk of golden sunshine is what is generally known as imagawayaki (or obanyaki depending on where you're from in Japan). What is essentially pancake batter is poured into an over-sized waffle pan of short cup shaped holes. The batter is then brushed along the edges until the it gets spread evenly throughout the cup. As the batter cooks, the baker deftly squeezes the desired filling into the centers of half the shells, then takes the other half and caps them over top of the filling. What results is the Asian equivalent to a jelly doughnut, known in Taiwan as the 紅豆餅 (red bean cakes).



As described above, filling is plopped into the middles of these batter filled cups. For 10 NT per (that's like 30 cents folks), you have the choice of 紅豆 (red bean), 奶油 (cream), 花生 (peanut), 高麗菜 (cabbage), 菜圃 (Asian turnips) as a filling... I know, the thought of a a savory obanyaki is weird, but it works, I swear. The reason why I love this cart in particular, is because the owner goes ape shit when he fills said cups. I don't know if the picture does it justice, but the height the filling reaches is like 2x the actual thickness of the obanyaki. Think about how much compression that goes under when he caps it... THINK ABOUT IT!!!



I'm have a personal preference for the cream filled ones, as they tend to be the most buttery, but the red bean is probably the classic, and the peanut has its charms as well. The cabbage and turnip ones are good if you're hungry, and don't feel like going sweet (which I think is moronic), but they're worth trying, since my tastes probably don't gel with most peoples'. I'd also be lying if I said I didn't like them at all *whistles*.

Anyway, if you're in the area of 光華 (Guang Hua), do yourself a favor and snake over to the old electronics market area, and find the cart that has the really long line (it always does). Also, if this post seems like something I've written about before, it's because I did. I feel like it deserves rehashing though, and plus... this particular cart merits specific mention.
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Random photos of food

Chalk this one up to poor documentation, or irresponsibility, but I don't actually remember the name of this place. I know an approximate location for this restaurant, it's near a relatively uninhabited section of 愛國東路 (Ai Guo East Road), and I can even picture the storefront. I can't for the life of me remember the name though... ugh. It's okay. I've been told by numerous people that they only visit to look at the pictures so it's no big loss (plus the people that gripe about not being able to visit any of these places anyway...). In any case, these dishes were cheap as sin... I think something like 70 NT (about $2). The only reason I walked in was because there was a sign outside saying that the daily special was chicken katsu. Go figure.



Let's see, the food came out ridiculously fast since I was the only customer there. It was... adequate? I mean, it was certainly better than I could do even with hours of preparation in the kitchen, so I guess it was better than that. The katsu was appropriately crispy on the outside, and piping hot on the inside, so it wasn't prepared earlier and simply reheated (which is incredible considering the amount of time I was waiting), and the beef yakiniku was excellently tender, although drowned by a cloyingly sweet sauce. All in all, it was good for the money spent, but let's just say I won't make an effort of it to figure out the specifics. To be honest, I'm just kind of OCD about having pictures that've been skipped over and not posted. Plus I really like pictures of fried chicken.
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Traditional Japanese food at 添財 (Tian Cai)

Nestled in an alleyway near the Taipei Main Station is a street called 武昌街 (Wu Chang Street). Rather unimposing, and actually dingy looking, there's not much located here outside of a few tailor shops and custom shoe places. I would never think to set foot down this street to be completely honest. There is however, a single restaurant here that makes me come back every few weeks, called 添財 (Tian Cai). Hehe, part of me just likes it for the name since it's a homonym for genius or '天才,' but part of me likes it for the traditional feel, the authenticity (the people who work here are actually Japanese!), and because it's a place I went to a lot as a kid. Whatever the reason, it's my favorite Japanese places in all of Taiwan. Oh, and sorry for the pictures, they got pissed when they saw my camera so I took all of these really quickly.



On this trip I chose to get the gyu-don or 'beef bowl.' This thing cost, I think... 110 NT ($3.50), so the prices aren't terrific. In fact, they border on the high end if you consider what a similar thing could cost in a less formal restaurant setting. In any case, it's as simple as it looks, thin beef strips marinated in teriyaki sauce is stir fried with onions cooked to transparency, peas, and scallions that are sliced into thin flattened strips. All of this is served over medium grain rice that is soaked further in teriyaki sauce sweetened with a slight bit of sugar and rice vinegar. The combined flavors of tart sweetness accented by the sweet flavor of the beef is a winning combination. No overpowering flavors, just a bunch of tastes that meld together perfectly. Simple yet effective.



My grandmother got fried fish of some sort. I tried it. I'm not in love with fish, but it was lightly battered and somewhat soggy by the time I got to it. The fried asparagus was good though, and I for sure jacked her fried sweet potato too (I love those things with a passion). I think the price might've been slightly higher since it was seafood, but I have a really bad memory. From the parts I had, it was solid. I just don't really like fish is all.



Final thing we ordered as 天婦羅 (tian fu luo) or Japanese style tempura. Similar in selection to the street variety I guess, you go an pick your own dish from a pot of daikon and pork broth. We got fried tofu, some daikon radishes cooked in miso, and a giant tempura disc. All of them were good, and I think the combined price of this dish was actually under 100 NT ($3). Interesting to note, the daikon radish actually managed to infuse the flavor of the miso entirely. Bonus, sweet sweet brown sauce on the side.

This is hands down my favorite Japanese restaurant in Taiwan. Disclaimer... it's not because it tastes incredible, or because the prices are so outrageous, I just happen to have a sentimental connection to this restaurant. When I was still a toddler, this was the only place I'd be willing to go to with my family, since it didn't reek of fresh fish. As such, my grandfather would take me here all the time, with my order being the same everytime... the katsu-don. So if you're gonna go here expecting the world, don't. That's not saying it's not amazing, I just happen to give it bonus points because of my childhood is all.
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Yoshinoya, a Japanese take on fast food

I think fast food in America needs a kick in the pants. As much as I love McNuggets and Whoppers, the lack of variety kind of gets boring after a while. Enter something like... Yoshinoya. Basically, what you get is a Japanese 'donburi' meal. Given the choice of beef bowls, pork bowls, chicken bowls, or occasionally signature Chinese dishes like 東坡肉 (basically pork belly slow braised in soy sauce), you're given an East Asian meal at the convenience of a fast food joint. What's not to love? Plus, clocking in at under 100 NT ($3) for even the most expensive of meals leaves my stomach full and my wallet happy. Compare this to McDonald's here, which charges me $8 for a burger meal... leaving me a super sad panda. Anyway, I went with the 'gyu-don' or beef bowl since that's supposedly their 'signature dish' matched with a side dish of snow peas, and green tea. The food is... meh, nothing to write about (ironic that I am writing about it), but not bad. Definitely worth the money, plus... the novelty of getting questionably authentic Japanese food in a commercialized place like this still hasn't worn off. Would I recommend someone go find a Yoshinoya in Taiwan? Probably not. I mean, it's not very difficult to stumble upon one of their buttload of locations, but if you're hungry and don't know what you want to eat... why not?

side note: Apparently there's a location in midtown that serves the food out of styrafoam containers. That totally ruins the illusion of authenticity for me. Why do you have to destroy something I hold so dear to my heart NYC? *cries*
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More katsu goodness at 大喜屋 (Da Xi Wu)

I'm pretty sure I have a quiz in a few hours, in the riveting subject of molecular phenomena. I suppose I could be spending my time looking over class notes and past homework assignments to learn the intricacies of statistical mechanics, but... why would I do that when I have so many blog posts left unfinished, sigh, priorities... I have none. Anyway, in progressing (more or less chronologically) to my next meal, I went to a place called 大喜屋 or roughly translated as 'Big Fortune House,' stupid, I know. What wasn't stupid though was how thoroughly incredible the food turned out to be. A little background on the restaurant, it's located in the alleyway that encompasses the open air section of 光華市場 (Guang Hua Marketplace), basically at the far end of the first street that sells electronics if you turn off 新生 (Xin Sheng). Okay, so I'm pretty terrible at directions, but I would guess most people in Taipei could find it. Anyway, it's a small store that clearly caters to students (gauging off the price), that sells katsu and ramen. Crazy right? 2 of my favorite things, super cheap... how convenient. Onto the food eh?


I'm going to preface this with a disclaimer, I don't remember the prices. I know it was really cheap since I never actually carry more than 200 NT ($6) on me at any given time, unless I'm planning on buying something. If that can order 2 full meals, then it had to have been cheap. First up was the katsu, which was pretty decent actually. I won't lie to you and tell you it was the most incredible meal I've ever had, but they take pork and fry the bejeezus out of it into something oily and delicious, pair it with rice (with special pork sauce to boot!), and give you choice of 2 vegetable sides. All for well under 100 NT. No complaints here.


Uh, I don't remember much about the ramen aside from thinking that the broth was really thick. I have no recollection of how the pork tasted, or how the noodles texture played into the equation, I just know that I didn't mind eating a bowl of hot soup noodles on a day that was probably well into the 30's... I mean degrees Celsius. Again, for well under $3, who could complain? In any case, the food at this 'house of luck' isn't overwhelming. It's just relatively simple food offered at an incredible price. Would I make a trip out of it? Probably not, but I did go back a few times when I went computer gawking.
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