Saturday, November 19, 2011

Wontons in chili oil (White Bear)

Wontons in chili oil (紅油抄手)

I came to two very important realizations this week... one, I haven't written about anything spicy enough to make me regret going to the bathroom lately and two, I haven't talked about dumplings in a while... let's fix both of those things today. Now, I usually adhere to the school of thought that things that are fried are generally better than things that are not fried - case in point: chicken, okra, turkey, pickles, and Oreos. Pretty convincing list. I will however admit that White Bear's wontons - while not fried - are probably the most sensual implementation of pork plus wrapper in the city. Yes, even better than the fried ones at Prosperity (and yes, I know they're different). For once, I'm gonna be one of those assholes who throws around the term 'best'. These are the best fucking dumplings in the city. Feel free to disagree. In which case I only have one question for you - how does it feel to be completely and utterly wrong? Probably awful.

What exactly are these bitches, and why are they so damn delicious? Well, like I said, they're not the same fried dumplings you can find pretty much anywhere in Manhattan Chinatown. They're 紅油抄手 which basically translates to red oil wontons. You take your standard thin skinned pork wonton, cover it in sweetened chili oil, then add on a buttload of scallions and other bits - for flavor and shit.

Like a flower...

Damn son. Look at that shit. Just peep how sexily that chili oil is dripping off the folds of that wrapper... like some oddly inappropriate metaphor that I can't think of right now. It's so explicit this post should be labeled NSFW. Sure, maybe these things don't have a nice crustiness to the skins like Prosperity's do, but they are doused in an oil that could qualify as liquid condiment crack. At first, you only taste the savory richness of the pork and sauce. You might start to think... "oh, these things aren't really that spicy," but gradually - as you shove wonton after wonton into your mouth at an alarming rate - the traces of chili oil start to numb your taste buds. By the time you realize what's happening, you've already shoved 15 down the hatch and your mouth is burning with the passion of 300 Greek men. Kinda like getting paid a million bucks to let someone punch you in the dick. Basically, you're both in heaven and fucked at the same time. The depth of flavor that these dumplings have is unmatched by anything I've had in the states, and probably most of the places that I've had it in Asia too. Shit is too legit to quit.

tl;dr - there's a shady-ass place in Flushing that says it serves ice cream on the awning. Don't be deceived, they serve the finest dumplings in all of New York City. Plus, there's the added bonus that you'll not only enjoy them at the time of consumption, you'll remember them several hours later. Entirely worth it.

White Bear‎
135-02 Roosevelt Avenue, Flushing, NY 11354

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Monsieur Nicholas,
The "oddly inappropriate metaphor" -- or p'raps the "wildly" inappropriate metaphor que vous trouvez -- spoken in volumes dans le deuxième photo.

Subconscious illicit image, um, well done. Trop drole, hehe.

Merci, dude.

Kevin said...

"...and your mouth is burning with the passion of 300 Greek men"

You never cease to amuse me.

Danny said...

yesssssssssssssss! i love this place. goddamn it, it needs to open up more shops in new york.

Nicholas said...

Anonymous - thank you for forcing me to Google random french phrases. I am learning a new language out of the blue now haha.

Kevin - I didn't realize how homoerotic that comment sounded until you singled it out without context...

Danny - let's do it. Let's quit our jobs... and open one of these bitches in midtown.

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